Thursday, February 12, 2015

not yours

mountains and valleys
gulches and rivers and plains

Friday, February 6, 2015

what the....

lately has been crazy.

and given the kind of life i've had the past few years (soon i'll be saying several. oy vey! i'm getting old...) i don't say that lightly.

here's the thing i've come to understand....even though i've made progress as a person, and my joys are sweeter and life is better over-all, i still experience what feel to be the lowest of lows. my challenges sometimes seem like a round of shots fired, paused for the reload and then fired again. i'm a better person now than i was a year ago. i'm happier and stabler and gentler and more free. but when challenges come i feel like they hurt exactly the same, maybe even more sometimes. and i'm still meaner than i want to be and still unforgiving of people and myself.

i'm just trying to get into a more sustainable rhythm in life. i don't expect anything to be easy. i know that i'm an intense person. it's what gives my creativity its life and its edge and so i'll embrace it. but i want to be able to ride the intensity like a wave, not get swallowed up in the undertow. does that make any sense?

do i ever?