Tuesday, August 24, 2010

when you're a nerd....

just my luck, the guy interviewing me is a jock. from the look of it, a big jock. "hi." he sits down across from me. he's wearing a white polo, a baseball cap and basketball shorts. don't be biased, i scold myself. just because he's dressed like a high school football player with something to prove doesn't automatically make him a moron.
"nice to meet you," i say, giving him a big smile.
he seems surprised that i'd use such a phrase. it takes him a moment to say, "likewise," or something along those same lines. i wonder briefly if he's forgotten that this is a job interview and not just some happenstance meeting or social call.
"so, tell me about yourself," he says, sitting back in the most painfully "i'm trying uber hard to look casual and cool" pose i've ever seen.
i begin tell him a bit of my work experience and he interrupts me. "tell me like, your hobbies and that kind of thing. like, about yourself." he says, looking genuinely pleased as though i should be thrilled he's a "cool interviewer" and not a "regular interviewer" who wants to actually know about my work experience and skills.
regular mom and cool mom. regular interviewer and cool interviewer. i almost laugh but stop myself.
"well, i love to write." a look of confusion passes over his face. "i love to be outdoors," i add quickly. the confusion quickly switches to understanding and approval. "i'm big into computers, i like nerdy games and that kind of thing."
his face looks terribly confused again. in fact, he's staring at me now like i'm some kind of anomaly. i can just hear his thought process. attractive girl. likes computers. plays nerdy games.................(blank)
what kind of games do you play?" he asks, exaggerating his casual seated position just a little more.
"computer games mostly. i'm sort of addicted to world of warcraft," i joke.
he stares at me.


"that's what i play the most," i finish.
"well..." he trails off a moment, looking out into The Distance at Something Really Interesting before looking back at me. "not that i care or am into those kind of games or anything like that," he assures me, "but let's talk about this...aren't world of warcraft and starcraft the same thing?"
"oh!" i exclaim. i'm not sure which startles me more, the fact that he knows what starcraft is or that he thinks they're the same thing. seeing that he's staring at me in that spaced-out way again, i add, "well, no they're not-"
"my buddy plays starcraft," he continues. "i tried world of warcraft once. i mean, isn't starcraft just world of warcraft, but in space?"
i have to fight back the urge to laugh out loud. "i know about ten people who would kill you for saying that," i tell him. it's meant as a joke, of course, but he suddenly looks defensive.
"well i mean, not that i know about those games..." he tries a different angle. "i mean, world of warcraft is where you build up armies and fight other armies, right?"
this is starting to become painful. my nerdy sentiments are not only offended, they're ripped open and bleeding freely. the hapless jock barrels on, intent now on proving that he knows what he's talking about to the Hot Nerdy Girl. "like, you have cities and stuff?" he demands, almost aggressively.
"well, you build up characters," i say, trying my best to be delicate. but it's obvious delicacy isn't this guy's forte.
"right, like cities and armies and stuff." he says.
now it's my turn to stare. the jock adjusts his hat so it's tilted perfectly to the side. i force a smile. did this interview really just happen?
"i played that game once, but i wasn't very good at it." he says after a moment of looking off into space.

no kidding.

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