i realized tonight that i am really, truly, genuinely excited about what the future holds for me....
although in many ways i have been happier than ever as of late, my health has concerned me. i just spent the weekend being exceptionally sick after testing if gluten-free was a must for me.
well, i learned that it definitely is. i have been so sick, that my positivity has once again taken a hit. tonight, i had my dad give me a blessing. it was so hopeful and positive, that i truly found myself feeling that although right now some things aren't easy, and though i may be in a lot of pain, it is not permanent. my life is going to continue and i will get these health issues fixed. i'm no longer too scared or weak to do what's necessary, because i know in the long run it's worth it. and i have faith that i'll be alright, no matter how scary my diagnosis sounds or is.
i know the Lord has a plan for me, and my blessing tonight reminded me that i have work to do on this earth. not only that, but i am meant to have joy like everybody else. i have learned the last few months that joy and suffering can be experienced at the same time. i have been truly joyful regardless of my health challenges and marriage ending.
the future holds wonderful things for me, of that i am sure. tonight i was reminded that i WILL get past these health problems and will live a normal life. until then, i will continue to bear with all the patience that i can, and lean on the Lord. He truly is the Light and the way, and i am so glad i have the priesthood in my life. i have hope and joy for the future, knowing that it holds wonderful things for me. i don't know when i'll get married again, or anything like that, but i know that i will someday and i will have the joy that marriage is meant to be. and until then, i'm loving living life as me- as a good person.