Friday, January 13, 2012

the craziest and best year of my life so far...

i've been wanting to write a proper farewell and eulogy for 2011 for a couple of weeks now. i wanted to do it when i really had the time to sit down and do it justice, because the past year has been one of the most challenging, heartbreaking and wonderful times of my life so far.

2011 started off with not quite a bang. i fell seriously ill only a few days into the new year, and two months into it derek and i decided to get a divorce.
but that wasn't all; i also started working a job that has completely changed who i am, my goals and a lot of other things. being forced to eventually quit the job i love so much and move back home, ended up bringing me closer to my family than i have ever been.

i learned a lot about maturity, about who i am and my beliefs. i learned that sometimes things are just too far gone, and you need to let them go. i learned to stop holding grudges.

i learned that i have an infinite capacity for love and a smaller one for hate- and i figured out that i'd rather spend my time and energy on the love side of things.

i learned that i can be happy even when everything in life seems to be going wrong...or rather i should say, when life is hard. i learned that you can suffer and yet have joy at the same time.

i've learned that trials truly are for our experience, and to let the Lord guide my path.

i began 2011 in a childish mindset, and left it as an adult. i am regaining the independence that i lost during the years of my marriage, and the confidence as well.

i saw, through example, what a relationship really should be and what an amazing thing it can be when it's right. i learned never to settle for anything, or to sell myself short.

i can sum it up like this: 2011 could have broken me. instead, it built me. i am self-aware and chose to learn and grow from my mistakes and misfortunes rather than using them as excuses or a crutch. i am now a HAPPY person...regardless of if i'm broke, or ill, or anything else. and i want to make others happy. i have come a long way.

so.....goodbye, 2011. best year of my life so far....but i intend for them only to get better from here!

1 comment:

KimWar said...

What an amazing post, so honest and beautiful!